Far too often thinking about masturbation conjures up the image of solo sex, but masturbation doesn’t have to be reserved for alone time. It can be a wonderful way to explore and communicate your wants with your partner as you enjoy a masturbation session together.
They have the pleasure of watching you give yourself some self-love and (if you want) achieve orgasm, which can be a very intimate way to share self-exploration. It can be a great learning tool for both of you as you discover which spots ramp up the pleasure dial and which erogenous zones are not so hot. Mutual masturbation is also a great way to get intimate when penetration or oral sex isn’t on the cards. Consider this your guide to mutual masturbation including masturbation tips, positions, and how to bring it up to your partner.
What is mutual masturbation?
Mutual masturbation is the act of two (or more) people touching themselves in all the right ways simultaneously. With research suggesting that over 95% of men and 89% of women masturbate, chances are you and your significant others enjoy solo sex. So why not take your solo pleasure in a different direction?
You might be left wondering why anyone would engage in mutual masturbation when they could have penetrative sex, but mutual masturbation has a whole host of unique benefits.
Why you should try mutual masturbation
There are plenty of reasons to let your partner watch you masturbate. For starters, you might not always want to have penetrative sex or oral, you might want to explore a different sexual activity and explore your bodies. Teasing your partner as they watch you and showing your partner what you like are also great benefits to mutual masturbation.
Another reason mutual masturbation might be great for you is you don’t have to be in the same room to get intimate which makes mutual masturbation perfect for those in a long-distance relationship. Just prop up your phone on facetime or skype and enjoy the view. Not to mention there are plenty of masturbation facts about the health and pleasure benefits of self-love. A few other reasons that you may want to let your partner watch you masturbate are to:
Change up your routine
Sometimes we have a narrow perception of pleasure and sex - starting with digital penetration and ending in orgasm. But your routine might need some mixing up. Penetration isn’t the be-all and end-all. Let foreplay become coreplay and focus on other forms of intimacy to sexually connect with your partner.
Compromise for when your libidos don’t match up
Libidos ebb and flow and sometimes your sex drive may not perfectly match up. Mutual masturbation is a great way to enjoy sexual release whilst keeping things casual and low maintenance.
Show your partner what feels good
For a visual learner, seeing your partner get off could help you learn new techniques on how to pleasure them. Showing your partner how to pleasure yourself could be a wise decision in the long run, as they have a deeper understanding of what feels good, the way you lightly touch your clit or when to turn the intensity up on your favorite vibrator.
Lower STI risk
Only touching yourself during mutual masturbation means there is a lowered risk of STI transmission because bodily fluids probably won’t be transferred. However, if you are receiving a helping hand remember you can still transmit STIs through sex toys and other means even if you aren’t having penetrative sex.
Sex has numerous health benefits including boosting your feel-good hormones. The rush of endorphins occurs when you reach orgasm and mutual masturbation can do the same!
Easier to orgasm
Orgasms can be slightly harder to achieve when you aren’t doing it yourself. Sharing the moment, whereby you give yourself a powerful orgasm, can be a great way to connect and for you to enjoy yourself. Plus you might want to use this as a starting point for introducing sex toys into your partnered sex life. Your partner gets to see how a sex toy in action enhances your pleasure and potentially joins in by using it on you.
How to talk about mutual masturbation
You might feel apprehensive about bringing up a new erotic activity to your partner but as ever it is important to discuss and engage in an open and honest conversation. Opening lines of communication will help you both achieve a better sex life and discussing your kinks and desires will only bring you closer.
Begin by focusing on the benefits of masturbating in front of each other. Is it a great way to build emotional intimacy? Can it help your long-distance relationship connect sexually? Or how about helping mismatched libidos? Are you into sex-ploring yourselves?
Whatever your motives are, express them to your partner and it may help them understand a little more about what you want.
Mutual masturbation tips
Create a sensual environment
Setting the mood is always a good idea especially if you are trying something new. It helps focus your mind and makes you feel sexy in a situation you might usually find yourself feeling a little awkward about.
If you are mutually masturbating through a computer or phone your environment needs might be different. Think a fully charged laptop/phone, some good lighting, and an unmuffled speaker.
Whilst if you are in the same location think about soft furnishings, delicious scents and a sexy playlist to listen to. You might even feel like watching porn or listening to audio erotica together, which can help turn you both on.
Mutual masturbation positions
If you fancy getting experimental with your positioning then go with what feels good at the moment. Do you want to maintain distance or get as close as possible without touching? Lay side by side and go to town or sit on your partner’s chest and play. Mutual masturbation can be the whole event, sexy foreplay, or a slow tease. For more mutual masturbation positions check out the MysteryVibe sex positions for inspiration that will spark your desire.
Sit opposite your partner and thrust against your chosen sex toy. Bend Crescendo at a 90-degree angle and explore, try bending backward or forwards, changing the angle, and experimenting with different speeds. Remember to listen to your body and what feels good.
Why limit your pleasure to the bedroom? Shower yourselves with some serious satisfaction as things get hot and steamy for you and your partner. Feel the water cascade over your bodies and let the deep rumbling vibrations hit all your pleasure points.
Multiply your orgasms with even more Poco sensations, showing your partner exactly how you like it as the vibrations roam over your nipples, across your neck or curve to reach your G-spot.
Don’t forget your sex toys
Using sex toys and lubrication during masturbation is a sure way to level up your satisfaction, and you can introduce your partner to your favorite sex toy without fear of hurting their feelings.
Pleasure seeker Crescendo
Crescendo's bendable design makes it perfect for some self-exploration with your partner. Designed to mimic your fingers, Crescendo is infinitely flexible so you can bend it to fit your body. Reach, discover and arouse erogenous zones from G-spot to P-spot, as you show your partner exactly how and where you like to be touched and learn new things about your body.BUY IT HERE
Pocket rocket Poco
Point and go with Poco's compact and discreet design. Pinpointing all those good vibrations exactly where you want them for a more achievable orgasm during masturbation, Poco is perfect for those who enjoy clitoral stimulation for an orgasmic time.
Solo sex supercharger Tenuto
Try incorporating Tenuto into a mutual masturbation session, for new sensations with Tenuto’s 6 motors providing 360 stimulation, sending waves of pleasure from penis to perineum. The revolutionary flexible design comfortably adapts to your penis whatever your size.
Enhance your mutual masturbation session with MysteryVibe’s range of award-winning pleasure products.